"What do you do?
I'm an accountant.
What company do you work for?
Oh, I don't work for a company. That's your definition of success. I do it for the numbers."
-Rob Paravonian
As an accountant, I measure the success of businesses every day, in dollars and cents. To judge a life likewise, however, is not a full picture.
Success in life has many different faces. Some people want that money out of life. Some want recognition, and some want power. Usually, when gaining one of these, you gain the others as well. An entirely different path leads to marriage, children, and friendships. I believe success is however you define it. If you want to be a good parent, and you are, you're successful. If you want to work your way up in your career, and you do, you're successful. The problem comes when one is in a role that predominately defines success one way, while you define success a different way.
Take my role. I'm an accountant. You can't be cool as an accountant and be broke. Therefore, a major part of my worth to my colleagues seems to be based on how much money I make, and what cool things I can buy. I have two kids. I can't buy anything that doesn't have to do with food or them. So, I don't really fit into that comparison. They seem to understand, but the fact that my kids mean more to me than money, and even the job, seems a little lost on them. I feel the worst about it when I'm talking to my boss, who had kids, and still managed to become a partner. If he can do it, so can I, right? And I should be expected to. But my family is more important to me than putting in 60 hours a week just to advance, or get a big bonus. Sure, it would be nice, but it's not worth it if my kids don't know me. Even worse if they grow up with money as their priority.
So what do you value in your life? Relationships, money, or a balance? I'm pretty sure everyone really wants a balance, but a lot of people like to aim for one and think the other will take care of itself. But if I'm putting my time into relationships, I have less time for earning. If I put my time into earning more money, I have less time for relationships. It's a balance that is very hard to achieve, and harder to maintain.
What do you value?